STE: Off the Pedestal
by ZenosParadox
Summary: RS friendship, Tu. Malcolm discovers what Hoshi meant by conjugations on Risa. Coda to 2 Days, 2 Nights, Season 1.


Title: Off the Pedestal  
  
Author: ZenosParadox  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Summary: RS friendship, Tu. Malcolm learns what Hoshi meant about conjugations on Risa. Coda for Two Days, Two Nights, Season 1.  
  
Disclaimer: The characters belong to Paramount. This fiction was written solely for personal enjoyment.  
  
OFF THE PEDESTAL  
  
Lieutenant Malcolm Reed got out of the shower and toweled himself off. It felt so good to be clean! Reed turned his gaze to the framed picture he had on the wall. It was a pin-up girl, Rita Hayworth in 1941, in her heyday. He had first seen the picture in the World War II memorabilia that his grandfather kept in his attic. Something about the pose, the seductive smile, not to mention the body, had captured his attention. The picture was black and white, but he never failed to be captivated by it. The dark hair emphasized the beautiful features of her face. He spoke to the picture as he dressed.  
  
"I don't think I'll ever drink with Commander Tucker again. I certainly won't trust him with setting up our shore leave. I should have known his luck with women was as bad as mine is. At least no one will ever know about our embarrassing circumstances."   
  
Rita Hayworth merely looked on with her mysterious smile. Reed and Tucker were not the only ones who left Risa with a little secret. Reed approached the image.  
  
"Next time, I'll see to the itinerary and do a detailed check on crime and security. I'll take a scanner as well." He gave a salute to the two- dimensional woman and added, "So much for finding someone to match you."   
  
An image of black hair flowing loose around almond shaped eyes came to his mind. He had to smile. None of the women on Risa had compared to how beautiful Hoshi Sato looked with her silky hair flowing about her, the gorgeous smile, bright eyes--and the legs! He spoke in a whisper to Rita Hayworth as he thought about Hoshi.   
  
"The best part of shore leave was the ride down to Risa on the shuttlepod." The easy camaraderie alone made him feel relaxed. Having a beautiful woman by his side, one who was a friend, was also a unique experience. "Hoshi just amazes me sometimes. She's so dedicated to her work. She actually spent her time challenging herself by learning the language. And here I thought I was the workaholic."  
  
Rita Hayworth continued to smile. Some men could be so naive in spite of their sophistication. They made themselves blind to a woman and then blamed the woman for their own foolishness. It could be quite amusing. But Reed was oblivious to the hidden meaning behind the smile of the woman in the picture.   
  
Reed walked out of his quarters to assume his duties. He was thinking that, yes, the ride down had been the best part of shore leave. He had felt as if he were part of a group instead of isolated from it. Overall, being on the crew of the Enterprise was the best thing that had ever happened to him.  
  
-------  
  
"Ensign, I assume we're still on for target practice today?" asked Reed for the second time.   
  
Ensign Sato appeared very distracted while they ate dinner in the mess hall. At times it appeared as if she were trying to tell him something, but perhaps it was just his paranoia. Something wasn't quite right, but the Lieutenant couldn't put his finger on it.   
  
"Huh, oh, sure. Target practice will be fine," said Sato with a small smile.   
  
Sato kept asking herself whether she had spent the night with Ravis as a way of getting back at the men for seeking out other women. The Ensign had a competitive streak; she would not have attained her academic success without it. She could attribute her behavior to keeping up with the boys, but now she was fighting an odd desire.   
  
For some reason, Sato wanted Reed to know about Ravis, to acknowledge that she could be considered a desirable woman. The Lieutenant had been the only man who had ever rejected her, albeit she had not intended the invitation as a date. They were friends now and Sato knew that Reed respected her as an officer and admired her skills with language, but she sometimes wondered what he thought of her as a woman. She struggled with the idea of letting him know exactly how she had spent her time on Risa.  
  
~~~~~~~  
  
"You need to relax your shoulders more. Good. Now, straighten your hand a bit," said Reed as he began the practice session with Sato. She aimed as the target began to appear at random areas, but she knew she'd show no improvement today. When she finished, Reed showed her the display: 33% accuracy.  
  
"It's horrible. I don't know why I'm wasting my time today."   
  
"Perhaps if you'd spent more time relaxing on Risa instead of working, you wouldn't be so tense," suggested Reed. "I must say I'm impressed by you work ethic. I wouldn't have spent my time on a pleasure planet conjugating verbs."  
  
Sato turned to look at Reed and saw he was being sincere, not sarcastic. He didn't know! Sometimes Reed surprised her with his insensibility given that he was generally such a good observer of details. Sato wasn't sure if she could live up to his expectations of her. Perhaps it was time Malcolm Reed acknowledged that Hoshi Sato was a woman.  
  
"Lieutenant, I assure you I achieved a lot of relaxation on Risa. I didn't spend my time conjugating verbs; that was a play on words. I met a man who challenged me to learn his language. I spent my entire time with him, including the last night, ALL of the last night. There. Do I have to spell it out for you?"  
  
The look of shock that quickly appeared on Reed's face was all the answer she needed. "I-Hoshi, how could you be so casual--"  
  
"About sex? It's not a dirty word. Isn't that what you and the Commander were after? Don't tell me you lost your clothes by simply sitting around admiring the women around you from a distance," responded Sato. She couldn't prevent the accusation in her tone.   
  
Sato saw Reed close his eyes briefly just after a hurt look appeared in his eyes. Where had that come from? She waited for him to speak.   
  
"I see. Well, then, I'm glad to hear you had a good time indulging yourself. You're right. Trip and I were after the same thing; however, we completely failed in our efforts."   
  
"You mean you didn't sleep with anyone?" asked Hoshi, incredulous that the men had failed to find any suitable women. She began to wonder more and more if her own actions were indeed initiated because of wanting to keep up with the boys. "Are the women on Risa blind?"  
  
"Let's just say that Trip and I share a common ineptitude where picking up women are concerned. Instead we were robbed by shape shifters and spent the rest of the time tied up in a wine cellar. Poetic justice, you could say, for our shallow behavior. We were just happy to get some robes on and make it to the shuttle. What did you think had happened to our clothes anyway?"   
  
"I thought that you were so occupied with women you had to leave in a hurry or had encountered a jealous husband or something."   
  
"Now you know the story. But why are you telling me about What's-his-name?" asked Malcolm, his eyes now expressionless.  
  
"Ravis, his name was Ravis, and I'm not sure why I am telling you about him. Maybe I want you to see that you weren't the only one who needed some release. Maybe I wanted to show you that a man exists who sees me as a woman, not just some Starfleet Officer."  
  
"I guess I don't really know you at all, Hoshi. I would not have thought you capable of a one-night stand," said Malcolm, some anger showing in his tone of voice.  
  
"At least I didn't go bar hopping to hook up with the first available person. Ravis was intelligent, caring, handsome--everything I could want in a man," Hoshi began. But he wasn't you, came the intrusive thought. Now she began to understand why she wanted Malcolm to know. Sometimes what you want in a person and what you need are two separate things.   
  
"So are you in love with him?" asked Malcolm, uncertain of why he was even asking the question. He had no claim on Hoshi. She was his friend, but the revelation that she had become involved with someone for such a short time was a devastating blow to his conceptions about her.  
  
"No, Malcolm, it was a sweet moment and I wouldn't mind seeing Ravis again, but there was nothing more we could offer each other," said Hoshi.  
  
"I see. Look, why don't we call it a day? It's obvious that your mind isn't with me in the armory, so best be on your way."  
  
He turned his back on her and Hoshi felt her heart constrict through the rush of hurt feelings. As she walked away she hoped Malcolm was feeling the same pain.  
  
Malcolm picked up the phase pistol and began a target practice sequence. He checked his accuracy: 50%.   
  
~~~~~~  
  
Reed rolled his neck to release the tension as he got into bed. He said good night to the picture of Rita Hayworth on his wall and finally found sleep, but with it came a disturbing dream.  
  
Malcolm was on a chessboard where all the chess pieces were life-sized. He was standing directly in front of the White Queen. Her cold beauty was etched into the face of Hoshi Sato, yet she was compassionate. Most importantly, the White Queen was pure, innocent, and virginal. Even though he was drawn to her, he knew she was untouchable.  
  
Then he heard the laughter and the White Queen vanished before his eyes. He turned to see the Black Queen approaching him, again with Hoshi's features. But this queen was seductive in body, her expression showing flashes of anger and cruelty even as he was captivated by the sexuality she exuded.  
  
Malcolm tried desperately to wish her into becoming the White Queen. Surely he could control his dream. He didn't want the White Queen to be gone, but the Black Queen's continued her advance as she spoke with a mocking tone.   
  
"You fool," said the voice between the laughter. "Where is your paragon of virtue? Where is your pure Hoshi Sato?"  
  
"She's still here somewhere. I'll find her again."  
  
Malcolm turned his back on the Black Queen. He was determined to rescue the White Queen, his Hoshi, from this nightmare. He began moving the masks on the faces of the other white chess pieces, but they were all featureless underneath.  
  
"Can you live with the fact that she doesn't want you, has never wanted you?"  
  
"That doesn't matter," insisted Malcolm as he continued to search for his White Queen in desperation.  
  
"You needed her to be pure, didn't you? You needed her to be beyond human desires to make it easier to curb your own." The Black Queen grabbed his arm to turn him to face her.   
  
"What happens when you start to think of her as a woman?" asked the Black Queen as she brought a hand behind his head and drew him down to her.   
  
"How dangerous is that for you?" whispered the Black Queen as she brought her lips to his.   
  
Malcolm woke up and tried to catch his breath. "Lights on, low."  
  
He rubbed his eyes, then turned to look to the picture of Rita Hayworth on his wall. He registered that enigmatic smile that had captivated him all those years ago.  
  
"You knew," he accused. But the woman was only a picture and did not respond.   
  
~~~~~~~  
  
Commander Tucker found Lieutenant Reed in one of the maintenance tubes, cursing to himself under his breath.   
  
"Why don't you say it louder so I can join in the fun? Now what are we cussing at today?" asked Tucker amiably as he scooted to join Reed.   
  
Reed looked to Tucker and shook his head. "I was cursing myself. This is the third time I've made the same mistake with this connection. I gave up working on the torpedo targeting earlier because I couldn't seem to be doing that right, either."   
  
"Guess it's a bad time to ask you to dismantle the weapons control panel so I can check on a glitch. What's got you so distracted? Can't be a woman, we didn't find any on Risa," said Trip with a chuckle. He saw Malcolm look up quickly, though, and his fast mind found it easy to make the connection. "So, maybe not a woman on Risa but a woman on--Enterprise?"  
  
Malcolm leaned back with his head banging softly against the tube. "Trip, really, it's none of your business. Actually, it's none of my business, either, so I don't even understand why I'm so upset."  
  
"Let's see if I can put this together for myself then. I'm not some dumb blonde, you know."  
  
Trip ignored the raised eyebrow Malcolm threw his way and continued. "It concerns a woman on Enterprise but you're upset by something that should be none of your business anyway. Hm. Gee, that's a tough one."  
  
"Just drop it. Come on, I'll see if I can--"  
  
"Now don't rush me here. Let me see if my poor little noggin can connect the dots. There are only two women on Enterprise that are likely to be on your mind. One you lust after but would never approach. That would be our resident Vulcan of the Celestial Bum."  
  
Trip saw Malcolm smile at the comment, but shake his head. The engineer continued, "The other woman you always hang around but allegedly never lust after. That would be our resident linguist. Hm, I think she'd qualify as a Sister of the Celestial Bum, too."  
  
"Really, Commander, I regard both women very highly as professionals and try to treat them with the respect due a Starfleet officer," said Malcolm.  
  
"Don't interrupt my thoughts. Now, where was I? The woman has done something to upset you but it shouldn't be any of your business anyway. So that means something in the woman's personal life. Got to leave out T'Pol then. That means Hoshi has done something in her personal life that has you really distracted."  
  
"I have no wish to discuss this further. Now, if you'll excuse me--"  
  
"Wait. I got it! You're upset because Hoshi got lai-had an intimate encounter down on Risa and we didn't!" Trip said with sudden revelation.  
  
Trip looked at Malcolm's expression and knew he had come close to the mark. "Hold on. It's even worse than that, isn't it? You would've been upset even if we had found some women. You're upset that Hoshi slept with someone period. Did I just see your blue eyes turn green?"  
  
"How did you know about Hoshi?" asked Malcolm, wondering if he had been the only one to take her comment about conjugations at face value.  
  
"Several crew members mentioned they saw her with this man and that they appeared to be getting quite friendly. Why? You mean you didn't get the little joke she made on the shuttlepod?" asked Trip, noticing Malcolm's flush.   
  
"As I said before, the matter has nothing to do with me," said Malcolm.  
  
"But it is affecting your work and I get the feeling you and Hoshi had a falling out over this. You're jealous and you don't want to admit it," observed Trip with a faint smile.   
  
"I am NOT jealous. I'm just--disappointed in her. I thought she was, that she would be more selective," said Malcolm, trying to put his feelings into words.  
  
"We weren't being very selective when we went down to Risa. We were after the first available women we could find, but it bothers you that Hoshi slept with someone," said Trip.   
  
"I never would have thought Hoshi capable of something so casual. I thought I was getting to know her, but now I feel as if I don't know her at all. She's the first woman I have come to see as a friend, but now, I'm not sure about her or about myself," admitted Malcolm.  
  
"I think I see what's going on. You've got that old double standard regarding women, don't ya? Good girls don't, bad girls do?"  
  
"No, of course not. I understand that women have the same sexual freedom as men," countered Malcolm.  
  
"You say it, but do you really operate with that idea? You have a sister, right? Do you expect her to be a virgin?" asked Trip, noting the quick flash of anger in Malcolm's eyes.  
  
"Commander, let's leave my sister out of this. Madeline's sexual history is no concern of yours," said Malcolm. But Trip had made his point. Malcolm understood his sister Madeline was a beautiful woman, but he didn't think of her as a sexual creature. She was just Madeline, a younger sister to protect.   
  
"Okay, let me ask you this. Did you ever meet a fella your sister was dating? How'd you feel then?" asked Trip.  
  
"I wanted to shoot the man for thinking he could touch my sister and I wanted to lock my sister away so that she'd stay untouched," admitted Malcolm.  
  
"Aha. Yet you have no problems with picking up a woman, who's likely to be somebody's sister, at a bar with the intention of sleeping with her," added Trip. "Sounds like you have quite the double-standard operating here, Malcolm."  
  
"I suppose I do see Hoshi like I see Madeline. She's like a sister that I need to protect from all the men out there who are like me," confessed Malcolm.  
  
"Now we're getting somewhere. I know what you mean; Hoshi's like a kid sister to most of us. But you know, I have no problems with her behavior on Risa. She was more selective than we intended to be. I think it's ironic that she went in just to challenge herself professionally and found some fun instead. She's been working hard and deserved a good time. So, let's get back to that double-standard of yours. Here we are, both admitting a brotherly concern for Hoshi, but you're the one who's upset with her, not me."  
  
"So you think I'm jealous? That I'm developing romantic feelings towards Hoshi? Nothing could be further from the truth. I hold her in high esteem and avoid thinking of her as a woman. She's intelligent, resourceful, brave enough to face her fears, compassionate. I admit that I admire her, but--"  
  
"But it helps you if you put her on a pedestal, make her as unapproachable as T'Pol is by simply being Vulcan. Well, Hoshi's not a Vulcan and she's not a statue. She's a flesh and blood woman and I think you're just scared to admit to anything that makes you see her that way."  
  
"I am not scared by Hoshi Sato," insisted Reed.  
  
"Oh, really? Have you apologized for being an ass yet or are you avoiding her?"  
  
"She's the one who flaunted her little affair on Risa in my face."  
  
"Uh huh. Wonder why she did that? Think it might be to get your attention? Look, Malcolm, you've got to adjust that double-standard of yours. Hoshi's the same person today that she was before Risa. You just know more about her now."  
  
"So I should just accept that our little Ensign is growing up?"  
  
"You should accept the fact that she's your friend and might need someone she can count on being on her side. So, how about seeing to that weapons panel for me now, Lieutenant?"  
  
-------  
  
Sato looked up to see Reed approaching her in the mess hall with a quick greeting. They generally ate with Travis Mayweather, but he was still taking his meals in his quarters as his leg mended from the rock climbing episode on Risa.   
  
"Ensign, may I join you?"  
  
"Certainly, Lieutenant," responded Sato. She released a deep breath. This was the first time she had seen Reed all day, but she was uncertain about how to approach him. They ate in silence for a while, but Sato noticed there was no anger emanating from the Reed this time.  
  
"Pasta's good tonight," said Sato in an attempt to break the silence. Reed merely nodded. Wonderful, she thought. She'd met her match in stubbornness and social ineptitude. This was not good.  
  
Yet, when the meal ended, he asked to walk her to her quarters. They entered and sat on the small couch. Malcolm made several false starts at talking with her.  
  
"Malcolm, why don't you just say what's on your mind? You think I'm horrible just because I slept with someone I had just met, don't you?" began Hoshi.  
  
"Hoshi, I can't say that wasn't on my mind when I first realized what happened on Risa." Malcolm looked as if he wanted to be swallowed by the floor after his admission.   
  
Hoshi had turned her face away from him, so Malcolm said, "Hoshi, no, look at me. I know it's wrong for me to be disappointed in you, but you need to understand how that little revelation made an impact on how I think about you."  
  
"You think I'm some slut now instead of a sexless Starfleet officer. I'm not sure which is worse."  
  
"That's not quite right. I put you on a pedestal and that cold, perfect statue came crashing down for me when you admitted to doing something very human, when I had to see you as a woman. It's the same adjustment I had to make as my sister, Madeline, was growing up."   
  
"So you're saying you see me as a sister?"  
  
"I'm saying that I try to make you fit into a mold that isn't working. It's hard for me, Hoshi. You're the first woman I've managed to keep as a friend and I don't want to do anything to ruin that relationship. You're teaching me a lot about misconceptions I have that I was unaware of. It'll take some time to adjust."  
  
"Malcolm, get rid of that mold you're trying to use and just accept me for who I am. That's all I want."  
  
"That's what I'm trying to do, but--look, communication is not my forte."  
  
"I suppose I manage to mangle it as well. I guess I'm sorry, too, for the way I told you about Ravis. I should have waited for a more private moment like this one where we could have talked things through. I was just so annoyed about your thinking of me as some workaholic. It seemed as if you wouldn't think someone could find me attractive enough on Risa with all the other women there."   
  
"Hoshi, I know you're a beautiful woman, but it's important I not dwell on that. We work together so I need to be able to see you as an officer--"  
  
"But I'm still a woman, Malcolm. I have no trouble seeing you or Trip or Travis as a man. That doesn't mean I'm going to be jumping any one of you in the corridor, though."   
  
"Perhaps you give us more credit for self-control than we deserve, Hoshi," said Malcolm with a half-smile. "And I think I got angry because I might have been feeling too overprotective about you. Like I would about my sister, Madeline."  
  
"I see. You weren't jealous, just brotherly," reflected Hoshi.  
  
"Right. Just a brother's interest in the well-being of a sister. I'm glad that you understand," said Malcolm with relief in his eyes that he and Hoshi had come to some understanding.  
  
"I think I understand things better than you know, Malcolm. Now, how about some target practice. I have a feeling that I'll have some improvement in my score this time."  
  
------  
  
  
  
Hoshi took aim, her shoulders relaxed as she fired at the target. She tried to imagine each misconception Malcolm was likely to have ever had of her.  
  
Unfit for space. She shot.  
  
Frightened of her shadow. She shot.  
  
After him for a date. She shot.  
  
Not willing to take risks. She shot.  
  
Pure, virginal, non-sexual creature. She shot.   
  
How many more would there be?   
  
"Well, you've really shown a major improvement this time, Hoshi," said Reed with a genuine smile. Sato looked at the readout: 70%, her best score ever.  
  
"I think I've found a way to hone in on the target," said Sato.  
  
Reed looked at her with sudden interest. Her smile was a match for the one on Rita Hayworth.   
  
*****  
  
Author Notes:  
  
Occurs after the crew return from Risa. Written May, 2002 and posted at LD. Minor revisions were made for this posting. This generated three additional stories: Kyupit's Oro (humor), Defining Moments (introspection) and One Day, One Night (Ravis meets Malcolm, humor).  
  
No reviews are necessary. Thanks for taking the time to read. 


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